Witnessing an Awkward Subway Encounter

Usually anytime I'm out in public - walking or riding the subway - I've got my ipod on, headphones in and am totally zoned out. Like zombie-zoned out (a reason I fail at celebrity spotting).

This is because I'm self-absorbed and typically avoid human interaction if at all possible. Notice I said human - if an adorable dog is around, I WILL make time for him.

Anyway, yesterday my ipod died at the gym, forcing me to endure the subway ride home void of distraction. So to entertain myself, I did what everyone else sans headphones does: eavesdrop on others' conversations.

Luckily a horribly awkward encounter unfolded before me. Note, some artistic liberty was taken. Allegedly (according to certain individuals, particularly those who have been blogged about, or have heard my stories, or have spent one second talking to me) I might do this with pretty much everything I do or say anything.

Scene: Trapped on the Subway with an Ex

Location: Downtown 6 train, Grand Central Station stop

Door opens. In walks an awkward, Jewish guy who spots a female he recognizes. We will call him Abraham.

Abraham: Hey! Rebecca! [sits down next to her]

Rebecca: [Look of disdained surprise] Oh, uh, hi! [Begrudgingly takes out headphones]

Abraham: Great to see you! How are you??

Rebecca: Um, startled to see you?

Abraham: I'm great too!

Rebecca: Yeah, it's, uh, been awhile?

Abraham: [Unfazed by her clear disinterest; even more unfazed by the continuous flashing of her wedding ring] I've been really busy with my job, you know, lots of work.

Incessant (one-sided) chatter continues.

Rebecca: [Continued display of combo-startled reaction slash indifference] Yeah, I remember hearing about that awhile ago...

Next stop announcement.

Rebecca: Oh, uh, this is where I'm getting off.

Abraham: Really, I thought you lived further downtown?

Rebecca: Uh, I moved...

- Door shuts -

Rebecca's attempt at a quick escape was successful. But she got lucky.

Awhile back I wrote about avoiding an awkward run-in on the street. The street, thank God, provides, plenty of hiding places to run off to. The subway? Not so much. You are literally trapped under the Earth.

Although this article about being trapped on the subway with a killer freaked me out, the thought of being confined with an unbearable ex (in this case, I would put serious money it involved J.Date)? Possibly worse.

OF course, now that I've blogged about the entertainment of watching others' misery, the Universe will probably trap me underground with the WBDB soon.

I'm hoping my prediction unjinxes any jinx I put on myself with this post.