Match.Mom In Her Element

I spent this past weekend with the fam in Austin, and the whole thing could have been an episode.

That's my dad's favorite thing to quote in reference to a family-friend's tendency to point out comedic observations of the Seinfeldian persuasian: finding hilarity in the every day life absurdity. Our family has a lot of these moments.

If you know my family, you know we're all, well, a little quirky. That's a nice way of saying crazy, right? My parents are the polar opposites of the same person, if that makes sense. My two (younger) brothers and I all fall somewhere in the spectrum between them.

We're also all very goodlooking. [Note: To be fair, one of my brother's is f*cking gorgeous, not just goodlooking. And brilliant, graduating from UT Engineering this weekend, congrats!!]

And humble, obv!

No, but seriously, my family is great, and this trip home made me miss being back in Austin.

Up until the point my mom tried to hook me up with a guy who was holding his gf's hand. Seriously.

Ol' Match.Mom back in the game. That move was a swing and a miss, though.

He was an usher at one of my college roommate's wedding (where my parents were my dates, wahoo I'm cool!). Per her penchant for matchmaking, I know she was just looking out for her sweet lil' newly single daughter.

Please look elsewhere. Thanks.

At one point a cute boy asked me to dance (Score! Didn't look like a loser in front of the parental unit!), and apparently my dad - thank goodness - spent the entire span of the song explaining to my mother how taking a picture of the two of us would be super embarrassing.

This woman knows no limits when it comes to Cute Boy Documentation.

To give you a taste (definitely not the full list because we don't have time to review years of this practice, people), I have in my collection of Awkward Mom-Forced Photos:

- a picture of Middle School Rachel at the beach surrounded by an entire baseball team of strangers

- a picture of me in California with random hot lifeguards

- a photo-album worth of photos of me and guy friends through the years that she thought were cute and hoped I would date [included in this list, I believe, is a picture of my former coworker Jersey. Awkward.]

Not embarassing at all.

Oh Match.mom. Now that's an episode.

P dot S: For Mother's Day, I found her the perfect gift: "Have I Got a Guy for You," a collection of horror stories about what really happens in Mom match-ups. Bwahahahahha. I already know it will not make the slightest impression on her, but I got a copy for me too thanks to The Strand's cheap book section. Pretty funny stuff.