Congrats on Not Peaking in High School

Unless you did, in which case, that sucks, I'm sorry.

This weekend I watched Can't Buy Me Love starring pre-McDreamy Patrick Dempsey who plays a the nerd jonesing to be popular. I'll be honest, I know this 80's teen rom com way less than any of John Hughes' movies, but it was on my new fav channel ABC Family (ugh), so J and I got sucked in.

J: "This movie has such a distinct place in my memory of 1987. I saw it in the theater with my friend and his big sister..."

Me: "Yeah, in 1987 I was working on walking, talking and throwing tantrums..."

Oh generation gaps.

Anyway, Patrick aka Ronald essentially "rents" the prettiest, most popular girl in school Cindy Mancini so he can infiltrate the cool crowd.

Like all teen movies - and all teen real life - being popular is the end all be all. It's like no one gets that after high school is college and/or the rest of your life.

Whether or not you were 'cool' in high school has no merit on how your life will turn out (unless you were an awkward social pariah in which case you might be forever and you should probably start looking for some friends who accept you for you because, sorry, you're just never going to be socially competent).

Maybe you were well-liked in high school and you're a generally cool person now. Maybe you were Editor of the yearbook in high school and now you're super cool. If that's the case, let me know and we can be friends. Maybe you were the undercover hot guy who just didn't give a shit and now is a huge ladies man.

There are tons of possibilities that don't follow the typical teen rom com formula that prove you can kick social ass later in life after high school graduation.

But my favorite plot line about the popular crowd are those who peaked before they were real adults. Because it's sad, and yet also makes me feel so much better about my own life.

That girl everyone thought was the hottest thang to walk the halls? Fat. Or maybe stuck at home forever, never finding greater success than she did with the entire football team. Or the hottest, dbag guy everyone wanted a piece of? Failed out of school, living at home, wasting his life. And to think you were convinced you were in love with him. Gross.

Pat on the back for those of us who know we didn't peak in high school. Life is a long time, and I'd much rather know I didn't waste it then.

Also, I'd like to congratulate those of us who were not child stars. Because child stars are like the most popular kid x 1000 and are practically guaranteed life failure compared to the success they realized early on. Clearly there are exceptions, but for every Mary Kate & Ashley there is a Crystal Meth Jodi Sweetin.

And what happens if you play the most popular girl in high school as a child star? According to a reputable L.A. industry friend, the actress who played Cindy Mancini was last seen working as a messenger. I didn't receive clarification if she was traveling by bike.

Bet she wishes she didn't waste $1,000 on that suede outfit now.