I'm Already So Over Valentine's Day

Although I won't deny that I enjoy the cutesy, heartsy festivity surrounding Valentine's Day - if for nothing else than to liven up February, an otherwise shitty winter month wedged between Christmas and Spring - everything else about it blows. Except maybe the abundant supply of chocolate. And craft ideas.

But, let's be honest, Valentine's Day as a holiday has pretty much been downhill ever since elementary school. Back then, you just showed up, had a sweet party where you got jacked-up on sugar, decorated shoe boxes with glitter and sparkly stickers, passed around generic cards confirming that you did indeed "rock" or were "totally awesome" (and when you got one from your crush, it was a sign you were most definitely going to get married someday, even though everyone else got an identical one from him too), and then you went home to crash from your sugar high. It ruled.

Now that we're adults, it seems like no matter how low we set our expectations for this holiday, it ends in disappointment. Or guilt. Or loneliness. Or all of the above, and none of which are particularly sweet treats.

And lately it seems that Valentine's Day has grown into something bigger than Barbie cards or Hallmark forcing couples into being lovey-dovey hostages to The Man. It has now turned into every company ever's favorite marketing ploy. If you're in a relationship, wherever you turn you will be bombarded with suggestions of how to celebrate your love. Cause if you don't do anything, then you obviously hate each other. Or if you're a single loser (just kidding), there are thousands of ways to meet someone, who you can hold to extremely high standards for Valentine's perfection next year!

Although I have received approximately 1,000,001 email blasts from various outlets (Time Out New York, I'm looking at you) about what to do this holiday, I still have no motivation to make it special. I have become Valentine's apathetic.

But, if you're less jaded about meeting your soul mate this Valentine's, might I point you in the direction of the potentially most awkward dating set-up ever?

Crunch's Flex Appeal: Speed Dating Yoga

Meet someone special during our night of light-hearted match making. You’ll be paired with a rotating cast of potential Mr. or Mrs. Rights to break the ice over an invigorating partner yoga workout. The match making will continue after class with complimentary drinks at a neighboring bar/restaurant. More details to be announced in class. Non-members are welcome, so bring your single friends along to get in on the action!

"Oh, how did you guys meet?"

He was facing my Downward Dog on Valentine's Day...

Awk-ward.