Roster Update: The Native New Yorker

My main points of reference for city kids are my older, Brooklyn-raised cousins, who always seemed so foreign and mature, and Gossip Girl. And also those weird, scary skateboarding hooligans in Union Square. I hate them (and when they almost run you over on your way to Whole Foods – assholes).

I’ll be honest, that combined mental image has always been a little bit of a deterrent when it comes to dating guys born and raised in the city. They’re a different animal. Not different as in bad or total dealbreaker necessarily, just a little harder to relate to. And so it’s no surprise that I’ve managed to go over a year and a half without dating a city kid. Sure I’ve met a few, but no one I was ever really into.

Like the guy who pursued me after we were almost plowed down in an intersection together by a red-light-running cabbie. I will be honest, he wasn’t that cute (he was no Trey MacDougal) – and five seconds after he introduced himself he had already volunteered how much paid for his apartment. It was muy aggressive.

Anyway, a few weeks ago I went to a rooftop party thrown by some friends in town. With my FGBF (French gay boyfriend… I miss you!) as my wingman, I managed to meet no guys. And then the minute he left, a 6’4’’, dark haired, green-eyed native New Yorker arrived fashionably late.

He took an interest in me (total self-esteem boost), and after talking for awhile, we made out. Because that’s what I do.

The next day, due to my little faith in the opposite sex (specifically MPD), I immediately texted our mutual friend to find out how big of a player he is known to be. She responded, “I don’t think he is?” Hmm, interesting concept, I didn’t know that existed in this city. Clearly no lack of cynicism these days…

Adding to his reasonably good reputation, since meeting - we’ve hung out again; he’s CALLED me on the phone (is he my mom or grandma?); and he’s texted/FB messaged me while I was gone for a week. From a quick textual analysis, he is doing fairly well: good caliber of banter, willing to flirt via SMS, surprisingly accurate breakdown of my personality - “90% sass, 6% healthy dose of self-confidence, 4% awkwardness.”

He is tall. He has pretty eyes. He is hot. But more than that - or the fact that he’s successful and 30 - he’s sweet, funny and possibly a little awkward himself.

An additional interesting fact about The Native: he owns a cat. Like a big, black, fluffy one with a scrunched face. In his feline defense, the cat seems more legitimate (both in size and intelligence/personality) than most of the guinea pig-sized dogs I almost step on walking home.

And no, Mom, I do not know how he feels about moving to Austin.