Guest Post: Match.Mom – A Success Story

Editor's Note: After receiving a complaint about my lack of posts, I suggested my friend Lauren write her own. Lauren has been mentioned before - she was the one who said every new friend was just a dollar sign (my new favorite quote), and she was also with me the night of stalking Chuck Bass outside the Gramercy Park Hotel. Clearly she is amazing. Enjoy.

Match.Mom – A Success Story
By Lauren

No, my mom isn’t crazy, she doesn’t have a Facebook account or stalking tendencies, and she has certainly never introduced me to potential FH. But recently she introduced me to someone far, far better: a potential FMiL (future mother-in-law).

I was at an engagement party this past summer for my BFF, when my mom introduced me to a sweet neighbor of ours who I had never met. After some friendly chatting, the following conversation took place:

FMiL: Lauren, do you have a boyfriend?

Me: Nope, I certainly do not.

FMiL: Well, I am shopping for my son, and I really hope you get to meet him.

[Note - if any lady with FMiL potential asks you if you have a bf, you should always say no. You never know when you’ve been blessed with an opportunity to trade up.]

That was it. The rest of the night, IT WAS ON. I turbo-charged my charm, casually highlighted some of my strengths and accomplishments, brought out my best dance moves, and even invited her and Mr. FMiL to join my family’s dinner table. So when I got home that night, like any discriminating girl with a brain, I stalked her son via facebook…

JESUS, MARY, AND JOSEPH… JACKPOT! He was hot, he was tall, he had a nice smile, and we had like 30 legit friends in common. I immediately began planning our future together.

The rest is history. We’re in love, and I know that our relationship wouldn’t be what it is had I not been recruited by his mom. There truly are a lot of benefits to meeting someone through your family that I have experienced first hand. You know from the beginning, rather than months into a relationship, whether or not they have a family you could stand to be a part of. Also, when your parents are involved you can’t go very long without being forced to define the relationship. And lastly, you both generally are on your best behavior, because you’re held accountable for your actions by people who know your parents.

All the benefits I just described pretty much depict the way high school relationships work, which I ultimately feel is a good thing. There was so much less bullshit back then.

I like you + you like me = we’re dating.

Lately, the equations have been much more complicated.

[(I like you + you like me) – (you work 100 hours a week) - you're applying to grad school + (you spend a lot of money taking me out / you’ve introduced me to your friends)] – you wear man jewelry^2 + your adorable dog already loves me – you live on the other side of town = who the hell knows.

The point is, in times when searching for a FH seems like a futile waste of time, embrace Match.Mom… maybe she really does know best? It's like taking dating into your own hands, but then passing it off into the hands of someone just like you, but older and crazier. Plus, it will make for some adorable stories at your rehearsal dinner.

Thanks, Lauren. You might be a genius.