Meet The German

Alternate titles for this post could also be:

• "You Have Never Dated Anyone So Good looking"
• Who Knew My Grandma Could Smile That Big  
• He Came Back From Florida With A Tan And Ostrich Cowboy Boots And All He Brought Me Was A Perfect Sand Dollar Because He Knows How Much I Like The Ocean, He Is So Thoughtful And This Is Just A Hidden Attempt At Braggery

Of all the years I lived in New York, none of the guys I dated overlapped with parental visits. On purpose mostly, but also because not a single guy would have been able to handle it. Not that my parents are too much to handle (although they are just the right amount of idiosyncratic to be hilarious), but I knew the way Peter Pan minds worked: Meeting the parents is one step away from Committing to Eternity. Not the case in my book, but whatever. Sorry I like my parents and thought you might too, gosh!

So when The German had stuck around long enough to be in the picture when my mom and Dolo were here, I knew he was the only tourist attraction that they really cared about seeing. And I figured he could handle it. He is a very good sport. 

We planned on dinner for Wednesday night, and I asked everyone what kind of cuisine they preferred. My mom thought having German with The German would be good, but I kept trying to explain to her that going to Berlin for “German” food was like going to New York and asking for “American.” I mean, what is considered American, a hot dog?  Same rings true here. Except in this case, the "delicacy" is currywurst, literally sliced up hot dog smothered with curry-flavored ketchup. It is something you would eat as a small child, except not nearly as good as a corndog, my favorite food from youth.

So instead I settled on a Thai restaurant, suggested by a friend from work. And it turned out to be the perfect choice. The food was great, as they say, sharing (entrees) is caring, and everyone enjoyed themselves.

My family was on good behavior (conversation topics stayed within the sanctioned parameters I had previously deemed appropriate) and they of course adored him, especially since he is a “smile talker” according to my mom. Whatever that means. But either way, I was not surprised by the glowing reviews considering he is probably the most charming guy in all of Germany.*

(*Solidified by him picking me up from the airport.)

P dot S: I told The German that the picture from dinner my mom posted on Facebook received a comment from my dad's cousin (hi!) asking if this was "The German." Ha. I asked him now that his "secret" identity has been compromised if I could post the picture here. He decided that you need to do a little detective work if you want to find it, you know, to keep the mystery alive. 

Perhaps one day he will relent. Either way, just so you know, the following descriptions have been shared with me via email from my Facebook stalking friends: "He's so cute! And SO tan!" and "He is SO goodlooking...like... derek zoolander model good looking."

I mean, normally I am not so vain that physical appearance means that much to me (obviously talking about guys I date, not my own vanity because, duh, that is of paramount importance!), but when in Rome Berlin why not?