Au Revoir, Ashley

My favorite friend that I’ve made in New York has left me. I’m trying not to take it too personally. She’s off to grad school, and while it’s only a few hours away and I know that she’ll frequently visit the city (her boyfriend is still here), it marks the end of an era.



Martha Stewart-inspired Halloween appetizers
and cocktails. Theme party domination.



We become work friends over two years ago. From there, we progressed to work-out friends. And then regular life friends. Whether it be gossiping, using each other for roommate therapy bitch sessions (luckily we’re both past the psycho roommate stage!), lunch time shopping, happy hour boozing, or hanging upside down in Anti-Gravity yoga, we spent a large bulk of our time together.

When I got a new job last spring, I knew that while we were no longer in cubicles mere feet from one another, we would still stay connected. Thank you, gchat.

And that’s how I feel about this transition too. Although she won’t be a subway ride away from brunching and clubbing (even though she had a boyfriend, she made an A + wingman), I know we’ll stay friends.

Big Apple BBQ partner in crime. The guy dancing
in the background was super creepy,
but the Austin music & BBQ were amazing.
Which is a good way  to convince people to visit.

Well, mostly because she has to. SHE’S COMING HOME WITH ME FOR AUSTIN CITY LIMITS MUSIC FESTIVAL.

(Is it sort of weird I consider this a “practice run” for bringing home a boyfriend someday? Like, here’s my crazy Texan family…I swear we’re normal.)

But Ashley is the kind of friend you don’t want to lose. She is thoughtful, generous, funny, snarky, and smart. It's hard to meet girl friends of her caliber. She is quality. She is a keeper.

I’m always impressed by her ability to do so many things well. Whether it be baking, excellent handwriting, or her rivaling eating ability, she’s been a great inspiration to me. Which I think is very important in true friendships.

Here are a few of my favorite memories:

Ashley with my family. I'm sorry that directly after this dinner, I forced her to drink cup fulls of vodka and instant coffee in my apartment before going out in MPD.

That did not end well.

I take full responsibility.



Ashley came to support me and The BFF during the

Avon Walk last fall. Look at that quality sign handwriting.

I will be honest, this was the pinnacle of our day.

Walking a marathon is hard. Sleeping in a tent and

doing another 13 miles the next day is miserable harder.



This was the night before Ashley's bday. It was a legendary

time of pure awesomeness, celeb sightings, free food/booze,
and a stolen bottle of syrup. We kept it classy per usual. I think
The BFF even did a legendary rendition of her signature hit
"A Whole New World," in the cab on the way home.

 

The beer garden in Astoria wouldn't
let her boyfriend bring in the cupcakes,
so he left them at a bodega. Have
you ever sang Happy Birthday in
the middle of a sidewalk in Queens?
I highly recommend it.



For her bday I got her the cookbook "Eat Your Feelings"
because she is my eating soulmate. Once she even
went with me and The BFF to Kennedy's.
She's not that innocent.

 Good luck! Miss you already!

Fashion's Night Out Domination By Proximity

Farah Angsana Spring 2010

Fashion Week mania has taken over the city.

Last spring I had my first in-person taste when I was fortunate enough to attend a show at Bryant Park. To be honest, I was more impressed with the backstage Mercedes' VIP area I got access to (thanks to my friend Ashley's sweet hook up) than with the designer's clothes, but either way it was a great experience.

Anyway, no show invites this fall but I did take advantage of Fashion's Night Out, the second annual event taking place on the eve of FW where stores stay open late with complimentary cocktails, gorgeous models, and music. The pocket of activity where we ended up - Fifth Avenue by Rockefeller - was sort of like a very stylish block party.

Of the hundred events taking place, the only one I was dead set on attending was of course focused on food. I have my priorities.

{Original picture via Getty}

Hosted by David Chang (Momofuku), Anthony Bourdain (TV's No Reservations), and Jeffrey Steingarten (Vogue food critic, Iron Chef judge), a restaurant overlooking the New York Public Library featured whiskey samplings and hors d'œuvres from Momofuku ssäm bar (one of my favorite restaurants). I was in foodie heaven.

But chatting with Jeffrey Steingarten was nothing compared to what would happen next.

The BFF, our friend Laurel and I left a little before it was over to head to another party. As we walked down the block, who did we run directly into?

Anna Wintour and her entourage. The Devil Wears Prada herself. The belle of the ball.

In the same tone of voice I would almost definitely use if I saw a velociraptor - unwavering terror and excited disbelief - I calmly screeched, "ohmygodohmygod do you see what I'm seeing?"

There she was, in the flesh, in all her tightly-wound bitchy glory. FNO victory and a night to remember. I love those.

P dot S: Only because this blog has sort of transitioned into Guide to Rachel's Personal Eating Shame Confessional, I feel compelled to tell you that on the same night I was two feet away from Anna Wintour, I also ate Popeye's. Red beans and rice > starving yourself to be a model.

Sometimes Even New York Is Too Small

Nothing embarrassing has happened to me in like half a day so obviously I was due.

After work on Wednesday, I met my friend Ashley and her parents, who were in town, for a drink. But not before I managed to scarf down an entire sandwich. By sandwich, I mean a five dollar footlong. I am a cheap fatass, what can I say?

So after catching up with them, the "I'm not going to make it to the gym for the rest of the week" guilt set it. Having had that entire loaf of bread soak up my cocktail booze, I made the decision to get in a little cardio before I went home.

Of course the minute I got into the locker room I discovered that I didn't pack a t-shirt, only a sports bra. I figured what the hell, the gym is fairly empty, only a few people will be offended by my half-nakedness, and I can get over the personal self-loathing of being that dbag who should be wearing a shirt but isn't.

When I was done, I justified that it was already dark outside, might as well just walk home as-is instead of putting back on my work dress.

Half way back to my apartment, who do I see approaching me? None other than The BFF's ping pong nemesis slash The Worst Person Ever.

GAHHHHHHHHH EXPLETIVE EXPLETIVE EXPLETIVE. Why, universe, why do you have to be so cruel? Of all the 8.4 million people...

Luckily he didn't verbally judge me for looking like I was pregnant with a food baby, and I didn't bring up the fact I purposefully didn't return any of his calls.

Ugh, I hope I still have the upper hand. Update: He just texted me. Still have it.

Then, another block later, I ran into a guy friend who lives on our street, but who I never see. Because, of course, I was just thinking to myself "the more the merrier in the case of awkward, shirtless small talk!"

Seriously, what gives?

Every (Texas) Girl Ever Is Ready For Fall

Every girl ever has had an amazing summer: the Summer of S.A.M. (single awesome mayhem) to be exact. Why else do you think it was the record hottest New York has ever seen? Yes, every girl ever is responsible for those insane A.C. bills. Her bad.

But now the weather is cooling off. The days are getting shorter. Every girl ever is sad to say goodbye to the fun, but she's ready for what's just around the corner.

Every girl ever loves this time of year. Even though she no longer has the start of school excitement, every girl ever still embraces the changing season. The spirit of new beginnings. The feeling of endless possibilities.

When she adds up all the factors, every girl ever thinks fall might just be the best season of all. Yep, better than spring flowers, better than summer sundresses, better than Christmas festivities. Well, maybe that last one is a tie. 

So what's the reason that Sept. - Nov. sits at the top?

She can feel it in her fingers, she can feel it in her toes, football season all around us, I'm pretty sure that's how this song goes?

Every girl ever has her game day outfit picked out and her game watching reservations made. As you know, every girl ever is a planner. To make up for the lack of tailgates and stadium visits, every city girl ever has found the best possible alternative: Hill Country BBQ, where fratty Texans congregate.

And, although every girl ever loves the gridiron excitement, even if she wasn't so enthused, I doubt she could pass up the a buffet of boys and beer. Let's be honest, every girl ever is an opportunist.

Fingers crossed every girl ever has a great season. Even if you aren't a Longhorn fan.*

*That's not totally true.

P dot S: No matter what time you're reading this, OU still sucks.

Rarer Than Seeing a Zebra Running Through Central Park

Have you ever seen a zebra in Central Park? Me neither. I doubt it’s ever happened. I’ll Google it later, just to double check.

You know what’s almost just as rare? A genuinely nice guy living in New York. I’ll be honest, up until recently, I don’t think I’d have believed it if someone said they had found one.

“Was he was riding a zebra?” I’d probably have asked. So jaded, friends, so jaded.

But I did. Guy #3 from The BFF’s bday to be exact. We shall call him The Scientist because he’s working on his PhD in some sort of biology/ecology-related field. My very own little Bill Nye. Yeah, the furthest thing from a FJO.

He’s so cute, smiley, and sweet. An Adorable Cupcake to be exact.

He’s also a great inside joke texter. The day after I had teased him about his consultation with his “older brother” type roommate about our dates - and how when he went home they would probably draw up a “pro/con” list about me - he sent me this:

I mean, really, is that not the nicest thing ever? So flattered.

Who knows where things will go with us – mostly because at this very millisecond I have zero idea what I’m looking for, which probably means I shouldn’t jump into anything serious with anyone – but he’s quite a catch.

And willing to tolerate a girl with a blog.

Ending The Summer in The District

Me, Mary, Mere.
You can tell this is an old picture because I'm a blonde.
Sigh, those were the days.

"The District." People in D.C. are almost as annoying as New Yorkers. Gah, what snobs. I love it. That's why I'm headed down to visit my friend Meredith, of "pls let me live the dream" birthday text message fame.

Our other former roomie Mary, of beauty product messiah fame, will also be flying in. Legendary reunion.

When Meredith sent out a pre-itinerary planning email, she asked if we wanted to do something "swanky, preppy, classy and/or dangerous."

Duh, all of the above. Will report back on our adventures.

Have a great Labor Day weekend!

The Perks of a Fake Relationship: Another Dating Company That's Better In Theory

The BFF and I have both complained that one of the crappiest parts about being single is losing your go-to text buddy. I mean, sure we have each other, but I don't think either of us would tolerate constant "what are you up to? i miss you" texts. Although I did get something similar to that from her today due to my lack of gchat presence this week, but whatever that's different.

Thank goodness, though, that someone came up with a company that will send you texts now that you are going to die alone. If you're interested, you can also get sent flowers, chocolates, and self-respect. Just kidding about that last offering!

Ranging from $14 to over $400, Pink Kisses - yes that's seriously its name - will give you a reason to live. According to them, they're a "hot new company offering all sorts of fun & feisty products and services to get girls over heartbreak in style."

To check it out, I took advantage of the free online "gifts" you can send to your friends. If you send anyone these, make sure to give them a heads up because the address it comes from is luv@pinkkisses.com with the subject line "You've been kissed." Aka it will be sent directly to her viagra-sale-filled junk mail folder.

You can make yourself motivating pin-ups:

I feel better about my singledom already, biatch!

As well as digitally burn pictures of your ex.

I felt too awkward doing it to someone who had actually destroyed my heart, so I went with The Situation. The fact that he's making tons o' money right now is pretty heartbreaking so I figured he was a good choice.

Refreshingly therapeutic.

Girl, I say save your money for the Flipper dating site if you're looking to move on, but maybe that's just me and my wild desires to interact with the hottie who I keep running into in my work elevator.

On second thought, giving him one of those cards would be far more embarrassing than my current tactic of awkwardly commenting on stories shown on the elevator's Captivate TV. Nothing breaks the ice like tragic deaths and falling stock markets, am I right?

Happy kisses!